Chibimail 4:

The Kidnapping! Part 1!

[by Firefly]



A spotlight is turned onto the deserted stage (TM) (with R.P.C.(TM)) and the writer stares expectantly at it. And waits.....


....Okay, where are they??


She finally gets tired of waiting, and storms through the RPC(TM) getting ready to bawl out the tardy chibis. And stares, as she sees that the rest of the stage is also deserted. Except for a BOP(TM).
(okay, this is akshully a BOP(TM) as opposed to a SOP(TM), 'cos it is intended for non-chibi folks such as ourselves. So there)

She looks at the manic writing, and sighs as she drags a spare chibi-Wufei out of hammerspace.

"Hey, Wu-chan, translate this f'r me will ya?"

"Don't call me that! Onna! Okeydokey!"
OOC I hear you say? Please to bear in mind that this is only a K-mart value spare. Although that is not to say that I don't love him just as much as the normal(?) chibi-Wufei. Speaking of...

Chibi-Wufei whips out a pair of oversized spectacles from hammerspace (or it's Wufei alternative. Whatever) and perches them on the end of his nose (awww, kawaii!). He begins to read:


"For the attention of whosoever is writing this piece of chibimail. I, the greatandevertobereveredworshippedandanyotheralternativesyoucanfindinthethesaurus-" Cchibi-Wufei pauses and gasps for breath. Honestly, no stamina (snigger (TM)). He resettles his specs and continues to read.
"-have kidnapped the chibis answering to the following names; Heero, Duo, Trowa, Quatre and Wufei..."
Here chibi-Wufei pauses with a suitably confused look on his face. "But I'm here!"


"Yes, well, um...."


Oh well, I suppose you have to tell them when they grow up, it's just that you don't expect it to happen so soon...


"There's something I feel you need to know..."


(Pause for totally gratuitous emotional sap.) The audience is not forced to watch, for two reasons:

i) It's not good for you.
ii) I can't be bothered to write it.


Anyway, after a suitable length of time has passed, we return to see:


"Okay, as long as you promise you love me as much as you love him!"


Well duh! didn't I just say that, like, a few lines ago!


Oh yeah, the fic!


Chibi-Wufei continues to read.

"I am holding them for ransom. They will returned unharmed, one by one, on the receival by me of suitably entertaining fics of the highest quality. One for each chibi. Send the fics to the following address:


Hentaichick@I'manevilcensored.com."


Here chibi-Wufei stops and gasps in horror, as does the writer, who chibified as soon as chibi-Wufei stopped speaking.


<Ominous Music!>

___________________________________________________________________


In the next edition!

Will the writer be able to save her chibicollection(TM)?

Will chibi-Wufei ever be reunited (or should that just be united?) with his clonee?

Will the writer ever be able even to unchibify?

Find out, in the next exciting edition of CHIBIMAIL (TM)!!!!!!


~Owari~



Notes
RPC = Red Plush Curtains (tm). Weren't you paying attention in the earlier chibimails?
BOP = Bit Of Paper (tm)
SOP = Scrap Of Paper (tm)

Well, hope that cleared that up!



So, didja laugh?

Firefly


[On to the next one - Chibimail 5: The Kidnapping, Part Deux]