Chibimail 9:

Chibi-Nakago's Dramatic Entrance

[by Firefly]




Firefly: Yo minna! Okay, I feel that this deserves a little preamble, mainly because it's the first thing I've sent you that is written entirely under William's influence.
William: Hey, I object to that!
Firefly: On what grounds?
William: On the grounds that I object to you assuming that I'm going to totally bloodify your writing.
Firefly: ....
William: Also cos I've got bigger teeth than you. Grr.
Firefly: I was wondering when that was going to come up...
Duo: Ooh, hentai!
Firefly: Hey, what are you doing here? You're supposed to be backstage waiting for your cue.
Duo: Well, it's like this. Me'n the guys was wondering why you were taking so long to get to the point. So I came to see what you'n him were doing. Together. Alone.

....
....

Firefly: Sorry, I was waiting for the rest. Anyway. Do you mind?! He's a vicious bloodsucking demon I'll have you know! Now git!
<Duo leaves, muttering something about stupid hentai writers who don't know what a good thing they had when they had it>


Firefly: Anyway Will, you don't mind if I call you Will do you?
William: Grrr...
Firefly: I'll take that as a no then. Anyhoo, you can't just go around threatening to bite people. Especially not me.
William: Why not. Growl growl.
Firefly:<getting a little exasperated- well, wouldn't you?> Because I flipping well said so, that's why! Now get on with your job!! Inspire me!!!
William:<deadpan> Bite me.



On the bare and dusty stage (with RPC(TM)) the chibicollection is gathered. They are waiting for their cue to start the show, but based on Duo's report, it sounds like they've got a long wait.


A wail of fury and desperation issues forth from backstage, and the assembled chibis unconsciously huddle closer together for protection.

Chibi-Q looks up at chibi-Tro;


"Trowa? I'm scared."


Trowa responds with a look of love and warmth towards the blonde pilot.


"Don't worry, I'll protect you." <huggles him close>


Duo watches them and a wicked look appears on his face.


"Uh, Hee-chan, I'm scared too. Give us a hug? Or whatever...eep!"


"Why Duo, I thought you'd never ask. This soon after last night anyway..."


'Hee-chan' grabs the sacred braid and uses it to yank Duo into a , er, 'whatever'. Best not to ask. Or look. Or listen even. <Cringes as a potplant falls from the sky. Oh well>


Chibi-Treize steps forward. It's up to him to take command of this motley group of performers-


"ONNA!"


skilled group of performers, I said skilled


Chibi-Treize surveys his troops, plans his speech, opens his mouth, takes a deep breath...


"The show must go on!"


...And is rudely interrupted as a new chibi steps onto the stage.


The assembled chibis look him up and down (except Heero and Duo chibis, who are still, uh, 'whatevering' behind the potplant).
He is taller than your average chibi, with long, blond hair, a slim build, and totally kewl clothes. His stance displays an unconscious air on command. As does the fact that he just upstaged chibi-Treize and lived to tell about it.


"Ooh mamma! Get me a piece of that!"


"My Dragon! You swore you were mine alone!"


"Yeah well, I got sick of you two-timing me with that dyed freak Zechs!"


<a klaxon goes off> "DO NOT SPEAK THAT WAY ABOUT MY SEXY ZECHSY! THAT MEANS YOU WUFIE!"


"Oh whatever."



Anyhoo, some minutes later, under the direction of the mysterious stranger, the chibis are organised into their places to start the show.


A bare and dusty stage (TM). Nothing happens. Chibi-Quatre sticks his head out through the curtain and hisses to chibi-Nakago; (that's right, you guessed it!)


"Duo was supposed to be doing this part!"


"Improvise!"


Chibi-Q's head disappears back through the RPC(TM) and we hear frantic whispering. Chibi-Wu's head comes thru the RPC(TM) next.


"Hey, Nakago-kun. If I do this part, so the show isn't ruined, will you get me a potplant for my room?"


"A potplant? Seems strange, but so do many things in this world. I suppose a plant is innocent enough. Alright."


Wu-chan's head disappears back through the RPC(TM) and muffled whooping can be heard. He steps through the curtains, having regained his composure.


"Ohayo Jongleur-sama. Firefly wishes to thank you for the FYmail. Especially for the yummy pics. Even if it did take her ten tries to get her mail because of it. She also wishes to thank you most sin-kera-lee for the nice things said about her writing, and she'll get on with more fics right away. With William's assistance..."


<large sweatdrop from everyone on the stage. Most specially H&D, who have come out from the potplant in time to hear this dictation of their future (snigger)>


"...Methinks that's everything, 'cept aren't you gonna write something? Innocent smile-"


"Wait! You won't supposed to say that bit! Oh it doesn't matter, just get on with it"- Nakago-chibi, quickly becoming resigned to the fact that most CHIBIVISION productions ... don't go as planned.


" That's all at present, and it's certainly all you're going to get at this time of night. Ja ne!!!!!!"


"Okay, done now, wanna potplant!"


The other chibis come through the RPC(TM). That's right, through. It's developed a sudden case of, moths, or something. Anything that means I don't have to use that smegging-


William: That's not what you really want to say...


You're right. That BLOODY delete key.


The chibis, in unison, pretty much: "Hey, where's our bit? And what's this about Wufei getting a potplant. We demand potplant rights too. We never get them when we want them..."


Watching from the lighting loft, William smiles. Chaos has erupted onstage. He got Firefly to use a naughty word. Violence has been introduced. And she gave him a Relena clone to kill. All-in-all, not a bad first day.



So, didja laugh?

Firefly


[On to the next one - Chibimail 10: The Big Red Chicken]